all i want for christmas

em and i went christmas shopping last saturday to finish all of her gift buying for family and friends. she had been given an amount of money from her grandparents this year that was designated for the sole purpose for shopping for gifts. she is very responsible and already had her lists made when we set out on this adventure. we started out downtown at her favorite shop. she purchased gifts for several of her friends here. i was impressed with her generosity and could see that she wanted to pick out individual gifts that each girl would love to open. the presents were wrapped while she was checking out at the register. they looked so lovely when the girl handed them to her. em smiled. she took her receipt and placed it in her "christmas money envelope" and we moved on to the next stop.

we decided to drive to calhoun for some of these gifts. again, one of those afternoons i will always remember with her. chatting, listening to christmas music and just being together. it was cold and crowded but this did not deter us. we went from store to store, looking, deciding, marking things off her list. as we were nearing the end of her shopping, she looked in her envelope and then got kind of quiet. i could tell she was thinking. "christmas shopping is expensive", she said pensively. i wasn't sure what to say. i could tell this was a teachable moment and she was getting it. i didn't want to ruin it by saying something too motherly or dumb. so i just nodded and agreed with her.

as we headed home, we stopped by starbucks to refuel. the line was wrapped around the building so she hopped out and ran in to get her hot chocolate. when she got back in the car and we were on our way, she remarked again about how much it costs to buy for everyone that you love. her list was long. this time i agreed and added that this was an opportunity for her to see how much everyone sacrifices at christmas time to give to each other. we do it because we want to, but it can be expensive. now she could see the other side of this christmas experience. as a little girl, it was all about the receiving. but she is crossing over to the other side of getting the whole picture now...just a little bit.

i thought about her later and how the day had been such a great learning experience. she was learning about being financially responsible and about being a thoughtful giver. it could have been tempting to withhold her generosity and not spend very much on people in a selfish way or she could have been irresponsible and spent too much. there is a line in giving and i don't know when you fully understand it or if anyone ever has a completely pure heart about it. but the heart of wanting to learn and wanting to do her best is what i saw. i saw her struggle with some things. all a part of growing up. i don't ever want to see her lose that generous or giving heart. a sweet christmas lesson for me.